Latest Journal Entry:My Username September 17, 2011, 10:46pm
Contacting Me
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There was a time when I could tell you that I was just me, a time when I could face you and say I am simply Hana. That time is long gone now, never around. I'm..tired now. It's too hard to decide who, what, or where I am anymore. I can't honestly say I know who I am, what I want to do with my life, or where I will be in 10 years. Maybe I'll be a famous designer, artist, singer, actor. Who really knows? Maybe I'll end up in a box in the rain, living under some bridge in a town I never heard of. I can't look at you and tell you I'll be okay.
I can't say I'm fine, because it would be a lie. I can't say I'm not fine, either, because that would be a lie, too. I just don't know what I am at this time. I'm trying to get my life together, to work it out. I go to school, I work my ass off, I care for people who hate me. I keep the faith on things I shouldn't even care about. I know that this faith is pointless, but I keep it.
I lay my head down on a pillow at night, and dream of being someone else. I wake up, knowing it was just a dream, and I feel horrible. But I keep on going, I keep trying, keep working at it, and never stop. I think..maybe if I work hard enough, one day it will all change. I'll be happy, free, and not worry anymore. I'll know who I am, what I want to do, where I want to truly be.
But..then again..when is happiness ever worth more than a lost life?
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