"Is it better to dream the perfect fantantasy, or to live the broken reality?" Ecilam Rynhart, MERCURY HOUND (my own original manga).
Hello to my audiance, since in reality that's what you have just become. The host of tonight's entertainment is Alexander Nicoli Morpheus. I'm an artist and love interacting with other artists of any kind wether you are a musician, visual artsit, graphic designer, web designer, sculptor, writer or anything else, I'll probably hit you up for some chat or just comment on your work(s). My art is fantasy/surreal and sometimes has a dark undertone no matter how bright it is in color. I am also doing comics. I will have the first chapter of a oneshot I'm working on up by Febuary 2011 so check in to find out where to see it! I'd love to consider myself laidback, trusting, kind, open-minded and above all else somebody worth talking to about anything. I am always up for chatting or whatever (unless I have work, which I take seriously). I do want one thing to be known; I do NOT like to 'hook up', 'swing' or have 'casual' sex. I believe it should be shared between a couple or two close individuals. Not strangers so wasted they couldn't tell you if they were macking on their cousin the night before (Ok, not everyone does that stuff drinks or does drugs, but you get the point). Ok, I'd like to get this out of the way, I'm a FtM, F2M, transfag or transman. MEANING; I was born FEMALE but am NOW a MALE. If that is too much for you to digest or you dislike me over that, then please, JUST LEAVE NOW. I have felt as if should be a guy since I could remember. When I was younger I almost always had short hair and dressed in or very close to a male fashion, unless otherwise prompted to wear female clothing. I was also open about wanting to be a boy, telling some family/friends that I wanted to have my breasts gone and a penis where 'that' was(is still, quite unfortunely). It's sort of hard to explain to someone who has never felt that way, that trapped and unknowing. After high school, or maybe during it, I started to be more feminine becuase people responded positively to that one. Everyone would be oh that's so cute or they would be more nice, or at least tat's how it seemed. But inside I felt as if a demon had traped the real me into some horrid doll, nothing like the me that wanted to get out. It's still sort of hard to describe, but does that give you an idea..? Anywho, I will not disclose the details of it all unless I know you well. Otherwise, as I am now, I am not in a stat of being confident enough to speak completely open about everything. Plus there are some personal things going on at the moment, so yea, respect my space, please & thank you. I'm currently waiting to get to Phoenix to have my hair cut off by Locks of Love, a hair donation place that'll cut/style my hair for free in return it gets used for cancer patient wigs. XD Happy to do my part! I am technically PANSEXUAL, but since hardly noone knows what that is... I really could care less about gender, BUT I do have a preferrance for feminine/flambouyant men. I have since I could remember. I had a couple of crushes on some pretty flambouyant and openly gay guys at school or at SCA (a non profit organization that re-enacts medival/reniscance times, and yea, I'm pretty sure I misspelled that one~ LOL). There were some chicks, too. One of my best girlfriends was short-live relationship, but oh so sweet. She made me feel like I was really a guy at times. Plus with her messy, multi-colored punk hair and gothed out clothing she was HOT. Too bad, she moved :( Heehee. There's actually one right now, but she has a guy, and I'm in no condition for a relationship right now anyway. It's focous on myslef and getting healthy time, not cheesy romance time. That's for later. ;D I have also lost weight and went from roughly 280 lbs to 200 lbs as of now through diet alone. I am going to start exercising/going to the local gym and toning up/loosing what weight is left. Then I want to get some muscle definition after I loose the other. Right now I'm a men's size 38/40. I'd like to be a 34 (at least) by my 21st birthday. That's a year and some months away, so, yea. LOL. Will add more pictures (better ones) later and as I loose more weight and get on T!
Likes
" First I whip it out, then I thrust it, with great force. Every angle, it penetrates. Until, with great strength, I ram it in. In the end, we're all satisfied." Dante, DEVIL MAY CRY 4. First up; I'm an O~TA~KU, otaku=fan of ANIME/MANGA and sometimes even the Japanese culture. I am all the above and have been since my first crush in elementry school. Some notable series which inspired me to persue a career in the fields are 'Cowboy Bebop', 'Vampire Princess Miyu' and 'Gundam Wing'. Recent animes like 'Neon Evangolian', 'Trinity Blood' and 'BLEACH' have also continued to inspire me.I also love video games for the art and/or story lines,k though I use to play them a lot I don't even own a TV anymore. I have made a lot of efforts to become physically active and sacrificing my tv and systems was just a small step in a weight battle. I am bound to get some when I am more active and have spare money though. LOL. Some of my favorites/most inspiring games for me are; 'Devil May Cry' series, 'Final Fantasy Vll', 'Final Fantasy Vlll', 'Gun Grave' series and 'Lunar' series. I write various pieces from poems to oneshot fanfiction pieces. My work is usually darker or light with dark undertones. I also prefer to write erotica to normal writings. Dunno' why, just do. Lol. " I heard a joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into tears. Says, "But doctor... I am Pagliacci." Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains." Rorschach, WATCHMEN.
Dislikes
"Do you know what the greatest and worst invention that humans ever made was? Television. Television controls people using information and steals their sense of reality. Yes. Now television itself is a religion." Londes, COWBOY BEBOP. Arrogance, misplaced hatred, looking down on others, picking on the weak, watching something morbid or tragic and just walking by as if nothing was wrong, not helping those in need even though you can, etc, etc.
Favorite Music
Marilyn Manson, Rammstein, HIM, Insane Clown Posse, AFI, 30 Seconds To Mars, Slipknot, MURDERDOLLS, Canibal Corpse, Lamb of God, NIN, Papa Roach, Linkin' Park, T.a.T.u., Black Sabbath, Ozzy, Rob Zombie, Twiztid, Dark Lotus, MCR, Fall Out Boy, Hinder, Evanesence, Londan After Midnight, Dope Stars Inc., My Chemical Romance, The Killers, AC/DC, and there's a lot more but I don't want to write all of them out... You get a basic idea of what I like! XD,
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